It’s rare for a fortune cookie to both summarize your life and give you a kick in the ass at the same time. My last one did. It says:
I learn by going where I have to go.
Charge.
Fortune Cookie
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It’s rare for a fortune cookie to both summarize your life and give you a kick in the ass at the same time. My last one did. It says:
I learn by going where I have to go.
Charge.
That is a good one. Sadly, my fortune cookies are usually either insulting or confusing…sometimes both at the same time.
Like the time I got one with a calculus equation as the fortune…then when I turned it over to learn the educational word, the translation read: "Bet you don't even know what that formula means, do you? Moron."
Fortune cookies taste like tears.
I hadn’t realized that fortune cookies stole from Western poets as well as Eastern ones; that’s a quote from Theodore Roethke’s “The Waking”, one of my favorite poems.
I don't like the inherent cheeriness in fortune cookies. True fortune could be good, could be bad. A fortune cookie is only good.
I especially hate the shitty advice that fortune cookies give.
I know the biggest thing stopping these companies from putting bad fortunes in cookies is "lawsuits" which is nuts. I think they should get sued by everyone who's fortune doesn't come out. Or someone could spill a bag of fortune cookies all over themselves and sue.
What would the lawsuit of someone suing a fortune cookie look like? "My cookie said I was going to die, and I didn't."
I have heard that fortune cookies are one of two foods NOT invented in China. The other one is ketchup.
I've given up fortune cookies. They are too scary. My final fortune cookie said "You are doomed to be happy in wedlock"